Slavery reparations? What a great idea!

from "Slavery Reparations," by Fred Reed (with minor content edits)


Henry Louis Gates Jr., the chairman of Afro- American Studies at Harvard, is demanding that whites pay reparations to blacks because of slavery. Gates is joined in this endeavor by a gaggle of other professional blacks, and they mean business. So I guess Henry will send me a bill, then?

Well, I believe in justice. So I'll tell you what, Henry. I'll give a million dollars for every slave I own, and another million for every year you were a slave, Henry. Fair enough? But tell me, how many slaves do you suppose I have? In round numbers, I mean...say to the nearest dozen. And how long were you a slave?

Oh.

In other words, I owe you reparations for something that I didn't do and didn't happen to you. Something that set other black people back. Well, then.

If we're going to talk about reparations for collective guilt, that's a street that runs in two directions. Not long ago, blacks burned down half of Los Angeles. Whites had to pay taxes to repair Los Angeles for you. You can send me a check.

Yes, I know you burned LA because you didn't like the verdict in the trial of those police officers. I get that. But I didn't like the verdict in the Simpson trial. But I didn't burn my house and loot Korean grocers. And, over the years, blacks have burned a lot of American cities: Newark, Detroit, Philadelphia, on and on.

But aside from that, we have spent a lot of money on you. There is the fantastic cost whites have paid over the years with their taxes going towards funding welfare programs, police forces, juries and jails. There are whites who have to pay to install security systems in department stores.

And there are other prices we have had to pay. I like capital cities. But I can't live in mine because I cross a small line on a street and I am in danger of my life and my property being seized by blacks.

Now, I'd view things differently if you said, "Fred, blacks can't get anywhere in a modern country without education. We need better schools, smarter teachers, harder courses, books with smaller pictures and bigger words. Can you help us?"

 I'd say, "Hallelujah! Hoo-ahh! Not just "yes", but "hell yes". Let's sell an aircraft carrier and get these folks some real schools and get them into the economic mainstream."

I'd say it partly because it would be the right thing to do, and partly, because I'd like to add you guys to the tax base, and I am tired of paying for you. Many people are tired. The current custodial state is expensive. I'd just love for blacks to study and learn to compete and stop burning places. But is it going to happen?

You may not believe it, but I, and most whites, don't like seeing blacks as miserable and screwed up as some are. I spend a fair amount of time in the projects. Those places are ugly. It's no fun watching perfectly good kids turn into semi-literate dope dealers who barely speak English. It just plain ain't right. But, Henry, what am I supposed to do about it? I can't do your children's homework...at some point, people have to do things for themselves, or they don't get done. Maybe it's time.

I'll tell you what I see out in the world, Henry. I think blacks are too accustomed to getting anything they want by just demanding it. True, it has worked for over half a century. Get a few hundred people in the street, implicitly threaten to loot and burn, holler about slavery, and the Great White Cash Spigot turns on. The thing is, we don't much buy it any longer. Most recognize that yesterday's civil rights movement became a shakedown game. Few people still feel responsible for the failings and inadequacies of blacks. Political correctness keeps the lid on -- but everyone knows the score. Which scares me, Henry.

On one hand, we have blacks who hate whites and are inclined towards looting and burning. On the other hand, whites are growing tired of this or figuring out they would be best off just dropping out of the system or going abroad. On the third hand (allow me three hands, for rhetorical convenience), blacks keep demanding things. As I write, you demand reparations for slavery. Well, blacks in Oklahoma want money for some ancient race riot. Other blacks reject the Declaration of Independence and want it dismantled; other blacks in New York hint broadly at burning and looting over a trial, yet more demand the elimination of the Confederate flag and still are not happy with Affirmative Action, and want to sue Silicon Valley for failing to hire the black engineers that did not show up. That's a lot of demanding for one month, Henry.

And what about you, Henry? You've got a cushy job up there at Harvard, and you can hoot and holler about what swine and bandits whites are and never see the consequences. I guess it's lots of fun, and you might even get a salary three times mine for it. But don't you think you might do blacks more good if you told them to complain less and study more? For example, if you want blacks to work in Silicon Gulch, the best approach might be to find some really smart black guys, and get them to study digital design, not Black Studies. That's how everybody else does it. It works. Then blacks wouldn't feel left out, and racial tension would decline. Sound like a plan?

Just out of curiosity, how many hours a week do professors of Afro-American Studies spend in the projects, encouraging poor black kids to study real-life, "sho-nuf" subjects instead of peddling a hatred of whites?